How do you get over the past? I cannot shake off the humiliating experiences of my past?
- Monday Nov 23,2009 08:39 PM
- By diddy
- In Others
Every time I sit quietly or try to read a book at bedtime, I start to recall every single bad/humiliating event of my past. I have no idea how to get over them. Here are some examples: choosing the wrong person for my bridesmaid; performance at a job; bad treatment from an ex; giving the wrong answer to a question in a class years ago; or the many other embarrassing moments of my life. How can I shake them off? Am I the ONLY person who has this experience?
Bad Treatment, Bedtime, Bridesmaid, Embarrassing Moments, Experiences, Job, Moments Of My Life, Sit, Wrong Answer, Wrong Person
4 Comments
i know truly what you mean…and it happens to me also, when i start to read a book! and it happens at other times too. when i keep thinking about my faluires and embarassements, i start getting angry, and hateful towards myself and others. …..but the thing is, it is impossible to do everything right..especially when so much of it depends on the dependability and actions of OTHER people, not yourself. ….sometimes it helps me to look at my bad experiences from another person’s perspective…like nobody will remember you making a wrong answer in class..you were just another kid who didn’t know all the material…and how could you have known how your bridesmaid would handle her responsibilty?
Don’t let your embarassements turn you into a frightened recluse…cause not many people remember them, except you. don’t let embarassement keep you from doing things you want to do that might cause more embarassement…..many things in life have a chance of causing humuliation. but whats so bad about humiliation? once you accept it, its not so bad. its just the initial hurt of losing pride in oneself or ones reputation that hurts….if you can give up your high expectations of yourself, maybe it might be easier to accept who you are, and that you make mistakes, just like everyone else. hope this helps, no offense intended if any was caused…just my personal experience from what helped me
I hope this helps, While we are all influenced by our circumstances and history, we all are responsible for who we become………unknown There is one other you cant go forward, if you keep looking back. I’m sure you are not alone , but you alone survived it, so pull up the boot straps. Best of luck to you
Wow. I thought I was the only person who this happens. Nice to know we are not alone. I have no idea what to do to make it stop. It happens to me a lot when I lay down to go to sleep. I try to focus on only the positive things and when that doesn’t work I just start thinking of ANYTHING else to make the memories stop. I was thinking (literally just yesterday) that I wonder if there is such a thing as selective amnesia. Where you could pick and choose the things you want to forget. That would be awesome! I am not sure why this happens to us but i know that most of my bad memories are associated to guilt. Are yours? It seems like I am unable to forgive myself for the stupid things I did in my past. I try to say, "you aren’t the same stupid girl who did that! let it go!!!" Sometimes the thoughts stay away for a couple days but then they slip into my mind when I’m not looking. If you want someone to talk to about it that understands you are welcome to email me. (I think you can send a message from my profile on Answers.) Sorry I couldn’t really offer help but I DO understand… Good luck.
humiliation is a one time occurrence, the pain only lasts for that moment unless you keep reliving it over and over in your mind
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